Turtle Power

officalsquidward:

totally-not-superboy:

smallpox:

instead of taking birth control you can have sex at night bc the sperm are asleep + you won’t get pregnant

Are you a U.S. senator?

If you have sex with the lights off, the sperm won’t know where to go! And you won’t get pregnant

legs-are-just-for-show:

BUT WILL THE 1993 LIVE ACTION MOVIE VERSION OF THE MARIO BROTHERS BE IN SMASH???

sliferexecutiveproducer:

furiclaus:

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you know when u hate someone so much u start imagining their face in the sky?

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because they beat u at a card game?

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seto kaiba knows

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"Remember who you are, Kaiba…"

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"…"

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"A loser."

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bewbers:

"we’re having guests over come downstairs"

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officialvanessadoofenshmirtz:

IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW

officialvanessadoofenshmirtz:

IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW

fagbarbie:

*doesn’t have internet access for a week*

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314eater:

prevalere:

you know how in some movies the bride/groom calls off the wedding to be with the person they truly love and then they live happily ever after well it’s pretty shitty that the person they were getting married to doesn’t actually get a happy ending but no one seems to care about it to the point that he/she is not even mentioned afterwards as if that person didn’t exist or had feelings at all yeah just a thought

Lord farquaad will be okay

captainbisexual:

it doesn’t matter how many “pretend to be dating” fics i read, i’m always fucking in it headfirst every time and i fall for that shit every time. i know the pattern i know the plot twists i know what’s gonna happen but every single fucking time i’m fucking on the edge of my seat wide-eyed whispering like “what’s gonna happen are they gonna fall in love” to myself like of course they are you fucking idiot this happens EVERY TIME but as soon as i see the description and it’s like “x person and x person pretend to do the dating” it’s eternal sunshine of the stupidest fucking mind over here

mollykittykat:


…. well…. there goes my heart…..

mollykittykat:

…. well….
there goes my heart…..

sharhk:

did you fall from heaven bc so did satan